Where better to go after experiencing the joys of helium, than to the Texas, land of big animals and big appetites. Well, the latter at least encompasses Dave and NOT. Of course, after leaving the helium monument, it was a short hike to the Cadillac Ranch. Just like previous Carhenge, this features 10 Cadillacs buried at the exact angle of the Cheops Pyramid. Why? The duo doesn't know, but since Bruce Springsteen sang about it, it must be cool.
Such a display of cars was only one part of the idea that "everything is bigger in Texas." Giant cows seem to grow by the roadside. And the portions are bigger also. You can get a free 72oz. steak (that's 4 and 1/2 pounds of cow) if you eat it all in the restaurant.
Homer Simpson is not the only one up to this Herculean task - "Elder" Logan Smith tries to give pointers to NOT in how he consumed 72 ounces in 31 minutes and 43 seconds. (That's less than 7 minutes a pound). NOT suddenly felt not hungry, and was afraid he might become an after dinner mint for Mr. Smith.
As if fearing for his life, NOT found that he was reminded that gluttony was one of the seven deadly sins, a sobering thought when confronted with the largest cross in the western hemisphere. NOT would have a hard time bearing this cross anyway.
NOT found some interesting statistics on this cross:
Total Height: 190 Feet (19 stories)
Total Width: 110 Feet
Total Weight: 2-1/2 Million Pounds (1,250 Tons)
Steel Tubing Frame Construction:
16" X 16" x 5/8" Thick Wall Tubing (Largest square tubing available in the world)
7" Diameter pins, weighting 300 pounds each, pin cross to foundation.
In an effort to escape, the pair jumped the border to Oklahoma again, only to be called hogs. Well, actually to be able to meet Imogene Barnhart, world champion hog caller. The first time she got a duck to come instead.
"Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it."
NOT felt there was something that he was supposed to remember, but couldn't. Even a trip to the Alamo couldn't help him out. I guess he's not a true Texan.
NOT however did remember the state capitol. How could he forget it, when his friend Erica Coffin led him straight to it.
Now Texas is very proud of its native sons, including that Johnson guy. Not the one that makes all those rude T-shirts - the one that has a space center. So it was the Johnson Space Center that was NOT's next destination. As if NOT didn't have anxiety about being small, he saw how big rockets had to be to get into space. Talk about thruster envy!
But without having to be fitted with a space suit, which always chafes his bill, NOT got to touch a moon rock. He didn't see much difference from the rocks in his back yard.
Photos (and some puns) courtesy of David Backman
Prepared Fall 1999. Last updated June 2006